If the cosmos was high-pitched school day , America would be the grown , dense athlete — at least consort to many of the travelling site that advise people of other nationalities what to do when they get stateside . So it ’s nice to find a people , who , grant to the travel advice they give their own countrymen , do n’t seem put out by American peculiarities . That nation is Italy .
1. AMERICANS WILL EAT ANYWHERE.
In America , eating etiquette is less nonindulgent than in most other countries , consort to Marco Scandali at his blog , Un Italiano negli USA . Particularly , it is acceptable to feed anywhere , even during a business meeting . Though Scandali proclaim the American inclination to only expend first names in the workplace , “ Their coming together are often a torture , ” he spell , “ since eating inside the league room is universally consent . I , however , can not talk over work with someone who licks dirty smelly sauce off his fingers . We are not at anactualtable , dammit ! ”
Also , since Americans tend to wipe out one hand , you will find it utterly acceptable to eat with your left-hand hired man in your lap under the board . This , harmonize to the advice websiteTropiland , “ is a custom gain from the Wild West , when the hidden manus was ready to grab the revolving door . ”
2. MEN’S BATHROOMS HAVE NO RULES.
grant to Scandali , “ in man ’s bathrooms anything is countenance , including smelly flatulence and loud dropping into the urinal , disregarding of the dupe at the next urinal . Take no prisoners . ”
3. AMERICANS DON’T REALLY CARE HOW YOU ARE.
Scandali tries to explain to his countrymen that Americans do n’t want an honest answer when they ask you how you are . Honesty equals whine to Americans :
Tropilandreminds readers that this surreal fake involvement extends to any non - specific invitation , too : “ The invitation to the house is almost always a pro forma and therefore you should not give it great weight . ”
4. BUT AMERICANS AREEXTREMELY SINCERE WHEN TALKING ABOUT MONEY.
“ Do n’t be surprised if you come to hear someone enquire what you garner , even though you just met , ” warns thePianeta Donnablog . Money matters to American polish . you may see it in their coffee tree , according toScandali . “ [ Good coffee bean ] is not trashy … but it ’s the price you pay for approach to a sort of exclusive club , ” he write . “ These are the rules of the market , and in America the law of consumerism is worth even more than the official lawmaking . It is their pride , after all . ”
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5. KISSING AND PETTING OTHER PEOPLE IS NOT OK IN AMERICA.
Pianeta Donnaexplains there are certain conduct that will do American grooviness to grind to a halt . poignant strangers ' tiddler , for instance : “ Generally , in the United States of America men annul petting the baby of strangers on the street , or even when invited into a dwelling house . ” In fact , rein in the physical affectionateness a bit altogether . No snog people you ’re not immediately related to — just handshake .
6. UNDERAGE DRINKING IS ALSO NOT OK.
Like many other nations , Italy is bewilder by America ’s mental attitude toward underage drinking . According to the change of location information siteAmerica4you , Americans will take every chance to separate a male child and his booze :
But at least this explains the secret of the bum - bottleful . “ Also it ’s forbidden to pledge intoxicant in the street in most state , ” the site notes . “ [ H]ere it is finally explained why in American movies people drink from bottles wrapped in paper . ”
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7. DON’T HAVE EXTRAMARITAL RELATIONS (IN VIRGINIA).
Scandali warns , “ ultimately , remember that in Virginia he who has sex outside of marriage is severely punished by a fine . ” Do n’t think it ’s a coincidence that state is name as it is .
8. AMERICANS ARE IGNORANT, BUT NICE.
Of course not all Italians think Americans are courteous . Yahoo poster bgsays that “ The mediocre American has a low level polish and education , most only know English and that inadequately . With the alibi that they are the first country in the macrocosm , their arrogance does not allow them to recognize that there are other cultures . The military posture of their culture is mutation , debris solid food and Hollywood . ”
But , as posterAlessandronotes , “ The ignorant are everywhere , but at least in the U.S. they are well-disposed . ”
Special Section: The Delightful Nuances of Hillbilly Talk
The websiteLaHoraDigitalshows that trivial extra touch ofbella vitathat makes Italians so loveable . Sure , anyone can pick up to speak English . But English with a Southern accent — that ’s where it ’s at . They give elaborate instructions on how to rick plain Italian - accentuate English into a fantastical and disturbing hybrid of Italian and Yosemite Sam - accented English . “ When I ’m mouth with a hillbilly , ” say the author , “ I already imagine the smell of rest home preparation . And if you require to talk with a southern accent , may be prosperous than you recall . ”
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Hillbilly Talk Tips :
Use " y' all " whenever you may . This full term consult to a single person or a group of hoi polloi . Never say " go , ” supercede with " fixin ' to . "
Take the Christian Bible , and add a few syllable . The " why " should be pronounced " waa " followed by " eye . "
Take the words of two syllables and reduce them to one , how to change the " sea dog . "
Use “ Purdy ” for appeal ; “ guess ” for recognize ; the awfullest , gol darned atrocious ; critter rather than creature ; breetches ; and Tarnation .
